Part 1 - In a Panic! Where do I Start?

Greetings from Me and My House,

Yesterday I received a letter from one of our list members, which I think many of us can relate to in many areas. Her questions were not simple ones with short pat answers, but deep questions of Life and a heart's cry for some Practical Application answers.

I will excerpt part of her letter here, then begin my answers, which will be a *series* of articles posted here. This is long, but I think you will all be able to glean much from it. Please print it out and digest it. It is the heart of L.E.D. She asked if I had any suggestions. I always have suggestions :- ) I just continually pray that the ones I give are directed by God to meet the needs of those asking. Although our list mom (LM) is asking for some practical, physical applications, none of the "things" I could (and will) tell her to do/try will help at all until she has been able to find a place of peace and rest in God. It is where we must all begin, or everything we do will be in the flesh and will not accomplish anything of worth.

See LM's excerpts below, and my beginnings of suggestions for her and any of you.

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LM'S EXCERPTS:
I'm on your L.E.D. email loop, and have gleaned much over the year......

I've spent much of the past two or three years (maybe more) trying to
learn & glean from too many voices (in retrospect....) I'm still floundering!.....

when I panic,and realize that time is passing so quickly, I push "school"... and Bible gets left out......I KNOW this is not God's way, but, continue to flounder......With our oldest at home being 13 1/2 I'm beginning to panic! I just have so little time left with her, and I want her (& each of them) to have a BURNING LOVE for the LORD, and to WANT to do His will for each of them. OTOH, I don't want her to be ignorant in respect of math, history, science, etc.

Where (or what) do I start? What do I concentrate on? I've recently
reread Wisdom's Way of Learning, and just yesterday, I reread (for the third time) your books, too. I understand that I must seek God's Wisdom FIRST & Foremost, but, what do I do with the children in the meantime? .... I *know* all the "right" things, but, I'm having a really hard time implementing them practically.....

you said that the children must *know* God and His character (I'm not sure I even know Him as I should!) How can I teach them this, when I'm just learning? Do you use the Bible for this, or have you another resource so that I (& the children) can learn this (God's character) together?.....

days are passing by because I have too many voices (so to speak) telling me "this is the way, walk in it"......I've ordered SO much curriculum in the past two years it's scary! ....and NONE of it gets implemented!).....

Your 7 Disciplines are wonderful....but, how do I implement them? One at a time....just work on Connecting with God (for myself more, and for each of my children), and THEN implement the rest?.....

I need some practical help on what to do with the four children here at home yet......

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Times of Refreshing - or - RPJ NHG

When we reach this point - and all of us do at some time or another, we need to do what is the hardest, most unnatural thing. We need to pull back and enter into His rest. As LM mentioned, even though she's "pushing school" and panicking over academics, all she's really doing is "spinning her wheels," going from one thing to another, without implementing any of it successfully.

Jesus' offer is still our only hope when we are burdened or weary - or confused out of our mind - we need to Come to Him and He will give us rest. Resting in that peace that passes all understanding is such an awesome place to be, a place that I suspect none of us stays in as much as we should. But when chaos reigns all around us, not just in this world, but also in our homes and our relationships, the only place we can go, to make it all better, is into His arms to rest. We should all know by now that we can't make it better in our own strength, and that God's voice isn't the one that yells the loudest in the midst of all the voices telling us what to do. His is the voice we hear when we "be still" and enter that quiet place, and turn off all that noise in our heads and listen for Him in our cleansed and open heart.

If I could impart into all of you just one thing through L.E.D., this would be it. For, if you'd learn and consistently practice this and pass it on to your children, all would be well. It is so much more valuable than teaching you how to write a curriculum, or to teach a child to read, or to plan a high school course of study and write a transcript. It is the foundation for all of Life. But as LM said, we need some practical training in even this. We need ideas and examples to get us started.

When nothing's working we need to go back to our stable foundation, to what we know is secure and won't fail us. In L.E.D. that foundation is the 7 Disciplines of L.E.D., beginning with "Connecting with God." I'd like to share some ideas from my workshop, "Times of Refreshing", and add some further insight and Practical Application specific to the situations LM is facing.

Many home-school moms are described in Luke 10:41, "you care and are troubled about many things." The stressed out, burnt out, overwhelmed, home-school supermom is "encumbered" just as Martha was. And like Martha they're saying, "If everyone doesn't get to work here, NOW, things that are needed won't get done!" Yet, in all her working and striving (in the flesh,) she was not commended by the Lord. The sister that wasn't pressured into a panic by the upcoming deadline of "dinnertime", the time when all must be ready and completed, was the one our Lord said, "chose the better part."

There are some physical helps for reducing home-school stress. Ephesians 5:16 commands us to "redeem the time," and we are also told that we are to discipline ourselves. But first and foremost we must come to a place of rest. We must deal with our troubled soul, by laying it at the Cross of Jesus and allowing Him to take our yoke of burden.

"Times of refreshing come from the presence of the Lord," Acts 3:19. As the bumper sticker says, "No Jesus, No Peace. Know Jesus, Know Peace!" Now, since we know Jesus, we have a saving relationship with Him, why aren't we walking in Peace? Could it be that the only way this saying "works" in real life is to apply the Hebrew meaning of "know"? To "know," in Hebrew, isn't a mental knowing, but a relationship knowledge, to be intimately in close relationship with, as a husband and wife experience true intimacy and closeness. It refers to the ultimate closeness of love where the 2, husband and wife, are entwined and "in" each other, and totally consumed in all of their being with each other. It doesn't refer to just "the act". Marital intimacy is to be a representation of the intimacy God wants us to experience with Him, the Joy, the Fulfillment, the Oneness. He wants us to abide in Him. He wants us to be in Him, and Him in us. He wants us to have time and passion for Him, like married lovers are to have for each other.

I know, that sadly, some of you women have never experienced this deep intimacy with your husband or God. You know God on the same surface level as you do your husband. You come together in the act, but you yearn in your heart for something more, for deeper closeness, for an abandonment of body, soul, and spirit to come together totally as one. Your spirit desires Oneness with your Lord and with your husband. Relationship is never a formula or a legalistic act, but a complete, vulnerable, opening up and giving of the heart and soul, holding nothing back. We can even enjoy the "act", but that doesn't mean we have a truly deep intimate relationship. We can enjoy a time of worship to the Lord in church, but that doesn't necessarily mean that just because we enjoyed it, we met with Him intimately.

I have so much more to say on this, but will leave you with a couple of thoughts, ideas, and scriptures to meditate on. Faith is our foundation for Life, and "faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word." We must always, first, renew our minds to His Word.

OK, Practical Application time.

Love is *Relationship*, not Law.

(There is no formula for loving my Lord, my husband, or our children. But there are some principles for successful relationships that we can follow.)

*Life* is Relationship.

(Everything else will pass away and be forgotten. Only relationships are eternal.)

For relationship with God that brings us Renewal, Rest, and Refreshing, we must come to Him on His terms, through His Son Jesus the Messiah, John 14:6. And, we must worship Him in Spirit and Truth, John 4:24.

Where to begin? To come into His presence we "enter His courts with Praise".

1) Pray - you can follow our model of P.R.A.Y. if you'd like.

P. - Praise and thanksgiving - always begin with Him, not yourself; praising Him for Who He is and thanking Him for what He's done.

R. - Repent - Confess and ask forgiveness and cleansing.

A. - Ask - for your needs - the need for peace, direction, etc.

Y. - Yield - Give Him control over all of you, your Life and your very being.

2) Word - Renew your mind. Here's some scriptures on this subject for you to meditate on.

Acts 3:19, Isaiah 40:31, Luke 10:39 (-41), John 15:5, Phil. 3:3, Phil. 3:13-14 [originally mis-typed,but 4:13 fits too), Gal 5:22-23, Eph. 5:16, Rom. 14:17, Ps. 16:11, Ex. 20:8-11, Ps. 1:2, Ex. 33:14, Mt. 11:28, Ps. 46:10, Mt. 6:33, Deut. 6:5, Mk. 12:30, John 14:6, John 4:24.

3) Worship - Put on an intimate, peaceful worship CD and sing along, or sing a cappella either worship songs you know or make up your own. Stay in this place until you are lost in Him and have peace. Don't come out until you have release. In fact, if you start to drift out, press in instead and He will take you even deeper.

What do you do with your kids? AND, TURN OFF THE PHONE!!!!

1) Get them out of the house with an older sibling, other relative, or friend.

Pro - you won't be interrupted.

Con - they won't learn by seeing your example.

But it might be good for your 1st time or few to be assured of no distractions or interruptions. (Of course, this is all cancelled if you have a nursing baby, in which case, you trust God's grace to cover you and try to pick a time when baby will sleep a while.

2) Get yourself out of the house - leaving your kids with a sibling, etc. The key to this is finding a place where you won't be inhibited in raising your voice in prayer and worship.

Pro - you know you won't get phone calls or unexpected visitors.

Con - not many people have a truly private place where they aren't inhibited.

Some ideas: Does your church have a room you can use, (when nothing else is going on), where you won't have to "keep it down"?

Do you own a camper you could go out to and park somewhere?

Do you live on a farm or in a rural area where you can find a field, woods, or a barn (weather permitting)?

OR even is there a place you can just go park your car and sit and pray and sing to your heart's delight? Cemeteries can be private places.

3) Have your intimate time with the Lord when your children are sleeping.

Pro - no babysitters, no one has to leave.

Con - they may wake up and distract you. *You* have to get up extra early (a virtue, so I'm told :- )

This isn't a problem, IF your children can be told that when they wake up you want them to stay in their beds (rooms?) and read to themselves/ do their own devotions until you come get them.

4) Do it during the day when they are there.

Pro - they will see you placing priority on entering a private place with the Lord, and hear (through your closed door) you praying and worshipping.

Con - if your children are very young or not well trained, chaos may reign and you may be distracted and interrupted.

Ideally, your children will spend at least some of this time connecting with God for themselves. If they are older (or you have older ones that can help the younger) they can go on to other quiet productive projects until you come out. If all else fails, let them watch a Veggie Tale video or 2 (or 3 :- ) quietly in another part of the house, where it won't distract you.

5) My idea of ideal? Take a couple of days (at least once a year) - ideally with your husband, not alone (but if your husband and you aren't there yet, don't beat yourself up over it - just do it alone) - to get away and seek God - for your relationship with Him, both individually and as a couple, for your marriage, and for your family (including home ed direction).

Although we miss our children greatly when we aren't with them, and nursing babes always go along with us, over the years we have found these times to be greatly refreshing for us, and we grow closer when we through them. These times, whether alone or with your husband, will benefit your children by refreshing you and enabling you to be a better parent/ home-school mom.

A couple of resources?
There are many "intimacy with God" books I like, but the one I'll mention today is "Experiencing the Depths of Jesus Christ" by Madam Jeanne Guyon (written in the late 17th century). (I'll mention other resources in later articles.)

If you'd like a book for you and your husband, one of the best we've found on developing spiritual intimacy with your spouse is "A Marriage after God's Own Heart" by David Clarke.

If you don't have our tape "8 Principles of Lifestyle Education", it covers the core principles of L.E.D. and gives some Practical pointers for getting started.

At Jesus' feet,
Lisa

Editted.